i have/had a lot of things going/gone through my mind which i wanted to blog about.

but i don't have the energy/patience/mood to.

i think this season's american idol is amazing. yes i watch american idol. take that all you i'm too cool for idol competitions people.

there's david archuletta and david cook. two very awesome davids. and ramielle malubay. i like her cos she's pretty. :D

anw, i was totally in awe of david cook's performance and i think everyone who hasn't heard/seen it must click play.

i had the most awesome (legendary) dream last night.

non-ironically, i found the girl of my dreams in my dream last night. i mean, she has to be in my dreams since she's called girl of my dreams right?

it was all so very awesome and surreal i didn't want it to end. but of course it did when the construction work begin.

the funny thing was, i have never ever seen the girl in my life before. and that gave me hope.

i could ramble on about all the things that are unfair in life. like why can't i bump into a pretty girl i know twice in two weeks and then start talking to her online and ask her out for coffee.

but whatthehey.

pardon me. its been a draining day.

so i finally sat down for an hour and packed my very untidy table. it was a rather painful hour. every piece of paper laden with notes, scribblings, calculations had some form of memory behind it. the long hours spent in the library, the amount of effort i put in were just some of the sacrifices that i made so that i could do well for the alevels.

but alas, all for naught.

whoever came up with the idea of karma must be pretty dumb cos there's no such thing as karma. what happens just happens. so if you get shit this time round, it doesn't mean you won't get shit the next time. it just means that's one more shitty thing you get to put down under the list that is your life's experience. if you pick up a $2 note today, it doesn't mean you'll lose $2 tomorrow. it just means you now have the money to go get yourself that copy of 8-days with the delectable picture of felicia chin you've been wanting to get along.

anyhoo, on to other stuff i've finally got rid of ipod nano and got my new sexy ipod classic which i've christened jessica. think alba, biel and simpson you'll understand why jessica.

i have been getting easily annoyed of late. and i believe this has everything to do with the results. i know its not as bad as it could have been, like for many others. but i know this wasn't what i deserved. sure, i'll most probably get a place in one of the 3 universities in singapore. but seriously, i expected more. and so, it is proven that hard work only gets you this far. not all the way.

i'm not very good with dealing with mediocrity. i know its not a particularly good trait to have but ever since young, i've been rather competitive. and i was a sore loser. i would feel very upset if i came in second-best or worse in whatever i choose to compete in. i even remember racing a guy on a bicycle when i was rather little. and i felt pretty good about myself after i beat him.

growing up, i realize i had to change. but all i ended up was covering up the fact that i hate to lose. i would just shrug, pretend i could easily shirk off what just happened and walk away, usually with a smile of some sorts. but deep down inside, i will always feel some sort of disappointment and that would usually cause my mood to worsen, only for me to cover it up.

its tough for me to handle the fact that so many out people out there who started out on an equal footing as me are now miles ahead of me. maybe i only have myself to blame. but whatever the reason, its killing me.

if God really has vast amounts of blessings and grace, i wonder where my share went.

lets just say i'm glad its over and done with

with an a for econs and b for gp my only decent scores. unfortunately they are both h1 subjects.

ah whatever. i'm feeling pretty indifferent now. i'm relieved i got an A for econs but the rest were pretty disappointing.

fortunately, i have an interest for econs so i'm just hoping i'll get a place in an econs course in any uni.

as much as i wanted to avoid blogging so i can click play on my latest youtube video more easily, i couldn't help myself.

OMG ITS REALLY COMING BACK. FRIDAY 2.30PM.

i have very conflicting thoughts at the moment. the first being i hope that they aren't actually in singapore at the moment so that at least there is a chance that the plane carrying the scripts and all loses a door and all the scripts and results fly out and land in the middle of the pacific ocean and the pilot makes a safe emergency landing. see, i'm not willing to compromise the life of the pilot. therefore, results will never be known and the pilot is safe. win-win situation. perfect.

on the other hand, this wait is relatively agonising and i can't wait for friday actually where i'll know once and for all if i have actually wasted all my energy just so i could do it all over again. frankly, i do not think that i'll actually have to redo this whole shit. but you can never be too sure about anything. not since the man with a limp escaped out of the detention centre. he has proven impossible is nothing. now to prove that nothing is impossible, he has to remain in hiding from our 'total defence' unit which is supposedly 4million strong.

since i'm you know, not working and doing nothing much at home, i'm all aware of the many important things that has happened recently. legs have been broken, famous hongkong icon passed away and somewhat-famous-but-now-infamous actor getting into some serious shit back in hongkong.

seriously, i think anyone who says edison chen is a victim in his own scandal is either a dumb fool or a girl. not to say that girls are dumb but you know, blinded by awfully good looks. he has been intimate with so many women! can anyone explain to me how is that a bad thing? if anything, he is the one who got the most out of the whole saga. huge publicity so that the whole world knows about him now so he can safely say he won't return to hongkong showbiz for a long time because he now knows that hollywood is in the know of his existence. if not, the american porn industry should suit him pretty well too no?

one door closes, many more open.

oh well. lets hope its tears of jubilation on friday. toodles xoxo

OMG DEBBIE WONG IS SO DAMN AWESOME. IM SO IN LOVE WITH HER NOW. OMG.
howard lo is such a wuss! I CAN OPEN A PACKET OF CHIPS FOR YOU! :))))

ohmyson the results are gonna be out in the next week. there's no running away now since it HAS to be next week. frankly, i don't want it to come back because i like my status quo. and it will hurt so so bad if i did badly (touch wood, plastic, metal) because it would have meant all those long days spent at the national library would have counted for nothing. E for Effort. nehneh. A for Affort. BETTER.

anyways, went out with some of the ocip people on monday. it was fun catching up and all and having good food at john's uncle's restaurant.

john with his stupid gay purple shirt from taiwan.

did two things today that should have been done 40 years down the road. went to play at punggol today and it was a rather enjoyable game. but invisible shorts girl didn't appear so that's a bummer.

house is making me rather cynical and sarcastic at the moment and i'm feeling relatively emo after dom asked a very thought-provoking question.

dom: "eh, do you have 6 people to carry your coffin when you die?"
mk: "..."

not because i thought it was a lame question and all but the truth was i couldn't find 6. dom and i decided we'll take turns to carry each other's coffin although i'm not too sure that will work out. i wonder why. but hey, i'm only 18 i'm sure i can find a few more guys to fill in the available slots.

so if anyone wants to carry my coffin when i die, please rsvp with me and ill get back to you in about 50 to 60 years time. for now, toodles. xoxo